The Art of Snapping Family Ties

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This weekend was Granny’s 78th birthday party. It was a time to get the family together and go on Granny’s Annual Birthday Picnic.

The weather shined on the day as the clan gathered at a Country Fayre down Somerset way. The plan was to all meet at the Fayre and thence to proceed to a secluded field alongside the lake and do justice to the food and toast granny’s big day.

To this end, sister #1 had spent the previous evening and night baking the birthday cake. Much effort had gone into it. Hours were spent in making certain the mix was just right, the oven was free of draughts and up to temperature and then the icing, (frosting for our USA friends) demanded the utmost care and precision.

Needless to say, the picnic spread (Jeanne, thanks for a few hints at your site Cook Sister) was excellent having been concoted, created and cooked or pickled or whatever by The Sisters Three, and much glee and gluttony was experienced by all in the feasting thereon.

The big moment came for the Birthday Cake to be uncovered and voila, there it was in all its splendour. Sister #1 was justifiably proud of the cake. It was tremendous! By pure fortune and not due to family pecking order, I got given a large wedge. Oh boy was it good. I made it last for 20 minutes at least and mopped up the crumbs from the plate in equal glee! Yummy!

And so the afternoon in the sunshine at a field covered in gloriously green grass (no lack of water spared here apparently!), passed by with dragonflies buzzing around, the sounds of the Fayre in the background, the odd passerby going to collect wild blackberries stopping for a chat and that summer afternoon stupor beginning to wend its way into all of us. It was a lovely day and granny was as pleased as a birthday girl can be.

At 4:30pm, tea was announced but before that Sister #1 had to go collect her car. Yours faithfully here, decided to move his Land Rover to accomodate Sister #1’s clapped out 1980’s Volvo sedan!

I reversed over the birthday cake.

End of picnic. End of glorious summer day for birthday granny. Return to sisters, nieces and nephews versus brother in an orgy of bickering then pushing and shoving and fighting, shouting followed by the girls crying spat! Not my fault was it? Oh yes. Apparently, I should have walked around the car instead of getting directly into the driver’s seat without first attempting to check the vehicle like pilots do as part of their plane’s pre-takeoff check! Had I done so I would have seen the birtday cake in its box in the shade created by my left rear wheel where for some inexplicable reason Sister #1 had decided to place it instead of in the shade created by a frigging big tree under which the picnic hampers were already located!

What a great day it turned out to be. I love picnics. Great sport!