Marketers Are from The Dark Side

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John Dodds at Make Marketing History says

Marketing Is Not.

1. Just For Christmas.

2. False Promises.

3. An Expense.

4. A Branding Paint Job.

5. Just Slogans.

6. A Head Office Function.

7. Glossy And Glamorous.

8. The New Black.

9. Just Promotion.

10. A Department

John is my favourite marketer but I fear he has been persuaded to defect to The Dark Side so below is my version of what marketing is:

Marketers are from the Dark Side

1. Marketing is aimed solely at forcing you to dig deep and remortgage your home to happily assist in the commercialisation of Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

2. Marketing is a precise and exact example of the science of misinformation about the meaning of Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

3. Marketing is a never-ending cash guzzler for client & endusers alike at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

4. Marketing is an opportunity to rebrand at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

5. Marketing is buzzwords and annoying catchphrases especially at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

6. Marketing is a Head Office’s evil necessity to enforce spending at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

7. Marketing is pastel colours and an A Listers’ Razzmatazz wet dream anywhere especially at the Cruise’s parties and even at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

8. Marketing is the new beige? Not at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

9. Marketing is promotion, promotion, promotion. I reiterate, marketing is promotion, promotion, promotion especially at Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals

10. Marketing is in a 52 floor building all on it’s own and grinds out it’s false glitz and bad promotion through Easter, Xmas, Ramadan, Pesach, Hanukkah, Births and Funerals Mondays thru Sundays, year in year out.

Marketers Are from The Dark Side