An oasis to run to in blogosphere when the social networks begin to pale. iScatterlings will be here.
June 22nd, 2007 — Inspiration
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People and the things they do in this life have an amazing capacity to suprise you out of the blue when you least expect it.
For those of my staff who were previously thought of by their ex-bosses as underachievers, I decided to do what I could do to bring out the best in them. They deserved this chance to prove they were not at all underachievers.
April 16th, 2007 — Inspiration
Evaluating the Judge by Michael Neill
One of the concepts I found particularly confusing when I first began studying all things personal development was the idea that judging people or even judging ideas was bad and wrong. I tried many times to reconcile this particularly judgemental indictment of the practice of judging, and engaged in many debates in my head which usually wound up with my judging myself as an idiot for making too much out of such a seemingly straightforward concept.
What finally resolved the dillemma for me was the distinction between a judgement and an evaluation:
*A judgement will invariably be made in the context of a moral code or personal value structre, and will generally be expressed in some version of the words “good”, “bad”, “right” and “wrong”.
*An evaluation, on the other hand, is an assesment of the value of something made in the context of a specific goal or set of external criteria. It will usually be languaged in terms of
words like “useful or not useful” and “worthwhile” or not worthwhile”.
Here’s what I’ve learned in the intervening years:
In order to be successful in nearly any endeavour, the ability to make accurate evaluations is essential. Judgements, on the other hand, are not only optional but when made in the negative (i.e. “bad” and “wrong” tend to lead to suffering and remarkably often, violence.
Let me give you a few examples:
1. You want to do business with someone.
After a series of promising phone calls and meetings, they do something they absolutely promised you they wouldn’t do.
If you judge them as being “a bad person” and their behavior as “wrong” you will become emotionally agitated and either end the relationship in a storm of self-righteous invective or continue working with them under duress while placing them on “triple secret probation”.
If you are making an evaluation based on your business goals, you will either put clear agreements and consequences into place to prevent that kind of situation arising in the future, or you will end the relationship.
2. You have a habit you don’t like
If you judge the habit as “bad” or “wrong”, you are likely to spend a fair amount of time punishing yourself for having it and resisting your attempts to force yourself to stop doing it.
If you evaluate the habit to be taking you away from your desired outcomes (peace of mind, well-being, loving relationships, personal success, etc.), you can choose to ignore it, do less of it or eliminate it altogether. In the meantime, you are free to re-place your primary focus on creating the results you truly want.
3. You want something you’re not sure it’s OK for you to have
If you judge your desire as bad and wrong, you will likely do your best to abandon them while secretly wanting them all the more.
If you evaluate them in terms of useful or not useful in relation to the wider context of your life (i.e. will this make my life more wonderful or less wonderful?), it becomes considerably easier to make a quick decision to either pursue your desire or not without any accompanying sense of guilt or doubt.
So what does all this say about “judging” - should we do it or not?
As I’m sure you’ve already realized, it’s a trick question - “should” and “shouldn’t” only exist in the world of judgements. (ie: if it’s good/right we should, if it’s bad/wrong, we shouldn’t).
So let’s ask a different question, one based on an assessment or evaluation:
Given your goals in life, will the use of “judging” make us more or less likely to achieve them?
Well, to the extent that your goals in life revolve around being a “good” person and doing the “right” thing, then the answer is a resounding yes. To the extent that your goals in life center on happiness and material success, the answer is more likely to be no. The energy and vigilance it takes to sort through the countless and often contradictory moral imperatives put through by society can be better used in the simple practice of focusing on what you want and taking action to bring it into being.
Today’s Experiment:
1. Just for fun, live the next 24 hours without judging anyone or anything. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do - it’s just that today you’ll be not doing them because you don’t want to, not because you shouldn’t.
2. Choose one person in your life you’ve been judging and this week, take some time to evaluate whether or not you want to continue to spend time with them. If you decide you do want or feel that you have to, what would it be like to do so without any sense that they shouldn’t be the way that they are?
3.Give yourself the experience of “unapologetic wanting” this week. Simply allow yourself to want what you want without fear, guilt or shame. You don’t have to do anything about it - just enjoy feeling the simple energy of desire coursing through your body!
PS - Are you in the UK? Do you want to learn the secrets of “unreasonable happiness”?
On the 28th of April, I’ll be delivering my first ever public workshop on how simple, easy to learn techniques can leave you feeling happy and assist you in overcoming stress, anxiety and even depression!
To find out how to come along to the event, visit Michael’s Workshop detailWorkshop
WANT TO LEARN MORE?
Here are some of my favorite resources for exploring and evaluating life with and without “the judge“.
Books and Web Resources
*Feel Happy Now! by Michael Neill (pre-order)
*The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
*Power Dialogues by Barry Neil Kaufman
*You Can Have What You Want by Michael Neill
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1401911838/geniuscatalys-20
Go and get many more Inspirational Tips for a Better Life by clicking on the little picture below!
Copyright 2006 Michael Neill
March 23rd, 2007 — Inspiration
I like this quote. Received it from Seth Godin as part of his The Dip programme
Seymour Hersch quotes the late General John D. Lavelle on Vietnam,
“Hey, either fight it or quit, but let’s not waste all the money and the lives the way we are doing it.”
March 7th, 2007 — Inspiration
Sing it to the tune of Grand Funk Railroad’s iconclastic song “We’re an American Band”. Go on, sing it loud, “I’m still a Cubicle Man“. Yeah, yeah! Unlike Grand Funk, this morning I don’t have anything to be happy about because (sing it loud), “I’m still a cubicle man“.
Grand Funk were happy when they recorded “We’re An American Band”, on their 1973 album of the same name. Released on 17th July, they were celebrating and loudly proclaiming their Americaness and uniqueness at a time when America was gripped in the depths of moral torment caused by the actions of President Nixon and his hoods at the Watergate hotel.
The Watergate senate hearings had started in May and the day before the album release, the 16th July, the senate hearing were told that President Nixon had secretly recorded potentially incriminating conversations.
Imagine the bombshell that had just been dropped on the American people. It was a huge shock to learn that your president, the leader of your nation that just happened to be the world’s leading superpower, was complicit in an illegal act and sactioned a burglary. Against this backdrop, Grand Funk Railroad’s song captured the spirit of the American dream and resurrected hope and reaffirmed that all was not lost in the Land of the Free.
God knows, America did need some respite from the doom and gloom and fresh hope to cling onto. This song provided it.
If you are still a Cubicle Man or Cubicle Woman and have a dream you want to make a reality, you need to listen to “We’re An American Band” loud. Very loud. It will resurrect your spirit, replenish you determination and desire to escape the cubicle. It will instill in you again your need to succeed as an entrepreneur.
March 5th, 2007 — Global, Inspiration
If life came bottled, would you buy LIFE Full or LIFE Lite?
Lite is an edited version of Full. It is smooth, streamlined, shallow, bland on the palette, low on aroma, beige coloured and has saccharine instead of sugar and other non-life threatening ingredients such as lack of courage to take on a challenge, no goals, diluted ambition and minimal hurt.
LIFE Lite is harmless.
It is boring but you can live to a ripe old age if you decide on this bottle. It is referred to on the street as ‘SAFE’. There are no adventures or surprises. LIFE Lite just glides smoothly on day after day with its own particular rhythm, helping you to avoid all the exciting bits in life like groping Thelma on the back seat of dad’s car at the drive-in, breaking a leg, cutting a finger, getting into a fight in which your wire coathanger thrashing elder sister threatens your existence, school exams, fraternity life, career decision & denting your car etc etc. It is dull, dull, dullsville. But you live to an old age and maybe get to see man colonize Mars.
Or you could go for the LIFE Full which contains every hazardous substance known to man and includes interaction with salad bars, other humans, Burger King, Big Macs, Frank Zappa, wars, murders, TV soaps, fatty food, heart attacks, cancer, the joys of love, birth, the suicidal depressions of heartbreak, Zanussi washing machines, river fishing and not putting them back, rock and classical music, muzak in lifts (elevator music), Foghat, Zeppelin, The Who, Metallica, strip poker, underage drinking, mourning and grieving the death of family, friends and relations, acne, braces, mortgages, eating fruit, no flossing, zero fabric conditioner, traffic jams, toxic managers at work, teenage sex, war, terrorism, adult infidelity, redundancy, The Sun, technobilge, unemployment, new career, new life, illness, good health, mumps ‘n measles, bad times, riding horses, buying non-ecofriendly light bulbs, politics, good times, reruns of High Noon, Sound of Music, Sin City, Casablanca and Apollo 13 and just take on LIFE in all its glorious unpredictability and loving it.
Make a choice. Do it now. So much more can happen when you make a decision.
March 2nd, 2007 — Inspiration
Below is a video of a British band that was blacklisted 35 years ago by the British music industry because they upset someone’s brother by walking out of the other brother’s band. All the original members who walked out to form a new band with a new slide guitarist can be seen performing one of their big hits a few years ago in the video down below. IJWMLTY is synonymous with the band and comes from their first album.
Stuck for a name to call the new band, they opted to go with a working title which was a word the lead singer used years before in a game of Scrabble. Trust a Brit!. It is still hotly debated if the word is indeed a proper word, but what do we care when the newly named band now known as Foghat goes and takes America by storm!
Foghat’s original members were: Dave Peverett (Lead vocals, rythym and lead guitar), Roger Earl (Drums), Rod Price (Slide and Lead Guitar) and Tony Stevens (Bass and backing vocals). Dave, Roger and Tony were members of Savoy Brown until they walked out to form Foghat.
Britain’s best kept top secret musical export went to play, tour then live permanently in the USA. They quickly filled stadiums, (outsold Led Zeppelin), earned double platimum and many gold records in America and other countries around the world but never in all that time, earned a single airplay on any of the the top radio stations in UK until only recently.
The band has gone through a few transformation and changes in personnel. Today the band still tours America and occassionaly gets to Sweden but as yet not to England. The new website is here at Foghat.net
February 26th, 2007 — Business, Global, Inspiration
I am a huge fan of the TV show Boston Legal. To me the onscreen partnership between William Shatner (formerly known as Capt. James T Kirk of the spaceship USS Enterprise in Star Trek) and James Spader is something legends are created from. The chemistry between the two along with a superb script makes for a fantastic show and a pairing of actors who feed off each other. I believe ad-libs between the two while sharing a scene, are not uncommon.
[I am reminded of the live performances with Michael Palin and John Cleese of Monty Python fame, who set out to 'corpse' each other. Cleese won most times but in so doing the live action between the two sparked and lifted the performances and the audience's enjoyment too.]
Boston Legal’s underlying theme showcases an ageing lawyer (Denny Crane played by William Shatner), who is is in the early stages of that dreadful illness Alzheimers. The tragedy of Denny Crane is revealed through humour. Alzheimers is a serious illness and David E Kelly, the show’s creator, treats the seriousness with appropriate delicacy and dignity.
In Season 3 it seems the opening sequences are getting special attention. Like William Shatner using a kazoo to blurt out the show’s theme music is especially funny. Other intros are given the humour treatment too like, “Cue music!”.
The fad caught on and has been taken up by fans of the show. Below is one of the newer scenes developed by a fan where the James Bond opening sequence is set to the Boston Legal theme music. Enjoy!
Later in Series 3, Boston Legal features Michael J Fox who had a hit TV series with Spin City, until he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease. He quit the show in order to focus his energies on fighting the illness, bringing more awareness to the disease and setting up and funding his foundation for Parkinson’s research. Boston Legal is an appropriate vehicle to showcase Parkinson’s.
February 22nd, 2007 — Africana, Business, Global, Inspiration
The excellent Stormhoek campaign conceived by Hugh Macleod has released a term into the world that has now taken on a new significance to us all. It should do and Hugh explains it best here and here.
But before you go wild and start throwing your empty Stormhoek wine bottle corks at me, I have to tell you that you are reading the words of the ultimate ’social object’ - me. Yes, je suis est la grande ‘object sociale’. Why and how can I so modestly claim this? Well you better read on to find out hadn’t you.
Years ago when I was a lot younger I was threatened with excommunication by my father if I did not agree with his most excellent idea to date for me to join the church choir and learn to screech/sing. But far from being miffed and moaning about my soon to be restricted lifestyle, it dawned on me that I had in fact just been handed an opportunity called freedom with a capital F and it was to be grabbed with both hands lest the chance that dad’s foolishness would never occur again.
So like all clever young kids, especially me, I rebelled most appropriately and sufficiently enough to cause dad to go get his slipper. Yeah, I knew even then that there was no gain without some pain. But there was no pain. Just the confrontation I was manipulating to make dad feel his threat of discomfort (he aways pulled the downswing anyway!), had sunk in, and that his spoiled good for nothing obstrepulous son would, after sulking, threats to run away, skin the family cat, stomp on the budgie and pouting so hard it hurt, go to church and learn to sing hymns. Properrrly. Choir practice occured at night.
Understand that here I was, a tender and sensitive responsible young soul, being forced by my father to go out on a schoolnight to have fun with a group of classmates interrupted only for a while by some singing practice. Oh gee shucks you should have seen the Oscar-winning performance every Thursday evening as I tried so hard to summon up the enthusiasm to go out to sing for my supper and dad’s everlasting happiness that he got one up on me! Hee hee!
It was the best of times for me. After practice we got on our bikes and sauntered back home or rushed off to go visit a friend and cause a bit of harmless schoolboy havoc. The warm evenings riding my bike toward the deep red sunsets are forever etched into my memory. It was during this time that I first tasted wine. Communion wine. Padre left a cupboard door open. Shucks. We all had to have a sip of the sweet red wine.
So when I read the technobilge below, I always immediately think of my days as a choirboy.
Remember this from April 2006? What does this mean?:
Deep, opulent orange hue. A nose of caramel, pastry, spiced oranges and apples. There is certainly some botrytis here, both colour and nose confirming this. The palate has quite a savoury structure to it, with firm acidity cutting through the mouthfeel. But there is plenty of flavour too, of burnt toast, stewed apples, caramel and honey. Takes on a greater sweet intensity with time in the glass, and has a good length. More reminiscent of Tokaji than anything else. Just scrapes very good
I’d sooner be munching chocolate.
February 15th, 2007 — Inspiration
How often have I reached this point and wished…..
I am beginning to really enjoy Microsoft thanks to Steve Clayton, the resident Microsoft UK blogging staffer.
February 13th, 2007 — Inspiration
I met up with Hugh on Friday at Newbury Tesco. More about this in detail later.
Hugh, Cath and Colin were busy with the Stormhoek Big Love Rose’ roadshow. I went to support Stormhoek by buying three bottles of Big Love Rose’ and also with the intention to get Hugh’s autograph. I got more than I bargained for. In my opinion, anyone who engages Hugh on a professional basis or as a bloke in the pub, gets more than what one initially expects from him. He engages you and gives more value than you expect.
This in itself is outrageous. Who does this in these days of economies of scale where in the main, you only get exactly 200grams if that is what you order? Hugh Macleod gives you more for your value. And it’s fresh too!
Anyway I asked Hugh to sign my piece of paper with the iScatterlings logo on it and got this back:
This is not 200grams worth. It is so much more. So I suggest that before tomorrow unfolds, you go today to your nearest Tesco and buy some Stormhoek Big Love Rose’ to give to your loved one with the dozen red roses. Go. Shoo. You don’t have much time left. Git! Shoo,go, go, go….!
February 12th, 2007 — Inspiration
“Success doesn’t come to you…you go to it.”
– Marva N. Collins, (1936)
Marva N. Collins, (born August 31, 1936) is an educator who in 1975 started Westside Preparatory School in Garfield Park, an impoverished neighborhood of Chicago, Illinois.
February 12th, 2007 — Inspiration
“The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too
high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.” -Michelangelo
A Millionaire’s Guide to Goal Setting by Michael Neill
When asked whether he set goals or not, a multi-millionaire ” super salesman said that he did and in fact always had, but not in the way that most people do.
Traditional goal setting encourages us to ‘think big’ and ‘reach for the stars’, but also to ‘be S.M.A.R.T.’ and keep our target constant while we ‘do whatever it takes’ to achieve it. My client didn’t do any of that. He would sit down once or twice a year over a good meal and a nice glass of wine and ask himself “What would be fun and exciting to make my life about over the next year?”
He would then take as long as he wanted to write out his ideas until he had a list that totally inspired him. As the year unfolded, he would check in with his ‘goals’ every now and then and adjust them up or down depending on how things were going in his life.
When he saw how horrified I looked (didn’t anyone ever tell him you’re not allowed to change your goals once you’ve written them down?), he told me something I have never forgotten:
‘The only real purpose of a goal is to inspire you to fall more deeply in love with your life.’
This week’s experiment will give you a simple way to play with raising and lowering your goals to keep you having fun, taking action and learning heaps every step of the way towards achieving them.
Today’s Experiment
1. Take a look at your list of goals for 2007. (If you don’t have a list of goals for 2007 and want one, I recommend Jinny Ditzler’s wonderful book ‘Your Best Year Yet’.
2. For each goal that can be quantified, come up with two numbers - the minimum that would feel like success, and the outrageously cool ‘oh my gosh there is a god and he obviously loves me!’ number.
Examples:
Income goals:
Minimum $55,000
Outrageous $250,000!
Weight Loss goals:
Minimum - Lose 15 lbs.
Outrageous - Lose 60 lbs. and fit into my old wedding dress!
Productivity goals:
Minimum - Write for 1/2 an hour a day
Outrageous - Write for 3 hours a day!
Sales goals:
Minimum - Contact 5 new prospects a day
Outrageous - Contact 25 new prospects a day!
What you now have is a ‘goal range’ - your goal range is to earn between $55,000 -$250,000 or to lose 15 - 60 lbs.
3. Choose a target to aim for within your goal range for now. The key to effective targeting is to choose a specific target that inspires you to take action. That number may change from month to month or even from week to week, but it’s important for your mind to feel inspired and your brain to have something specific to aim for.
Examples:
Initial Income Target - $75,000
Initial Weight Loss Target - 30 lbs.
Initial Productivity Target - Write for an hour a day
Initial Sales Target - Contact 5 prospects a day
4. Periodically review your goal range and targets to see how well you are doing and if you are still inspired and taking action to get what you want. If not, adjust the target until your heart starts beating a little bit quicker and the goose bumps appear on your arm.
Go and get many more Inspirational Tips for a Better Life by clicking on the little picture below!
Copyright 2006 Michael Neill
January 30th, 2007 — Inspiration
“The secret of joy in work is contained in one word - excellence. To know how to do something well is to enjoy it.”
– Pearl Buck (1892 - 1973)
Pearl Sydenstricker Buck, most familiarly known as Pearl S. Buck (June 26, 1892 - March 6, 1973), was a prolific writer and Nobel Prize winner. Pearl Buck was an extremely passionate activist for human rights. In 1949, outraged that existing adoption services considered Asian and mixed-race children unadoptable, Pearl established Welcome House, Inc., the first international, interracial adoption agency that has been operating for nearly five decades. Many of Buck’s life experiences are described in her novels, short stories, fiction, and children’s stories. Through them she sought to prove to her readers that universality of mankind can exist if man accepts it. She dealt with many topics including women’s rights, emotions, Asian cultures, immigration, adoption, and conflicts that many people go through in life.
January 17th, 2007 — Inspiration
“The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you’ll never find it.”
– C. P. Snow (1905 - 1980)
Charles Percy Snow, Baron Snow, CBE (15 October 1905-1 July 1980) was a scientist and novelist. Born in Leicester, he was educated at Cambridge University, where he became a Fellow of Christ’s College in 1930. He was knighted in 1957 and served as an assistant to the Minister of Technology in the Labour government of Harold Wilson. Snow is most noted for his lectures and books regarding his concept of “The Two Cultures,” as developed in The Two Cultures and the Scientific Revolution (1959). He wrote that the breakdown of communication between the sciences and the humanities is a major hindrance to solving the world’s problems. Snow’s work aroused considerable ferment at the time of its delivery, partly because of the uncompromising style in which he stated his case.
January 12th, 2007 — Inspiration
“Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours.”
– Dale Carnegie
Dale Carnegie (November 24,1888-November 1,1955) was an American writer and the developer of famous courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking and interpersonal skills. Born in poverty on a farm in Missouri, he was the author of How to Win Friends and Influence People, first published in 1936, which has sold over 30 million copies through many editions and remains popular today.
