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Do you work for a toxic boss? Are you completely devoid of any motivation to do your work? Ever felt that you simply cannot go to the office anymore, and the internal forces driving these thoughts through your mind are so utterly compelling?
Well you are not alone. A friend of mine has unfortunately kept quiet for two years about her experiences under an arrogant, micromanaging, insecure bully of a boss. And it has driven her close to a total nervous breakdown.
I was appalled to learn about what her toxic manager put her through. I heard how he undermined her, would never listen to her innovative concepts and totally discounted out loud in front of others any ideas she came up, had the temerity to order her directs, (never had the courtesy to ask her to get it done), to do tasks regardless of what work she had assigned them and then shout at the staff member for providing the wrong data plus he would never take responsibility for his initiatives going wrong. It was always someone elses fault.
My immediate reaction to hearing all this was an adrenaline pumping violent urge to confront him and sort it out man to insecure bully. But I realise that this was not going to resolve the issue nor keep my friend in a job she used to love and be highly regarded at doing. She was/is thought of as being in the top 10% of her profession.
What she had was a manager the company thought of as the ‘blue eyed wunderkind’ and so promoted him in from another division to direct the department with zero experience of her professional discipline nor what the department actually did.
Who is to blame?
Let me know what your thoughts are.
3 comments ↓
It is very difficult for someone who has been bullied to confront a bully. And you shouldn’t have to. If there is another layer of management, they should confront the bully for you. It is their duty of care.
In my case I am a middle manager and it is an employee (with a lot of talent I should say and valuable to the organisation) who is the bully.
Hi there,
Just browsing through web site and read this article about bullying, recently I had been working for a 67 yr old marketing lady rottwieler- After being quietly savaged by her several times- always away from the office - taken into meeting rooms and clinically disected. i had before just accepted her demands, tantrums and used to end up just agreeing with her, just so much easier to go with the flow, BUT bullies thrive on pushing boundaries more and more so while I was in yet another one of my interrogation meetings, and reprimanded for picking up my pen - Twice! I just decided that this was as far as this was going- I had been to a job interview and had said Ineeded to give a month’s notice- as my boss had booked all August off- an I really wanted to avoid a difficult scene. This went right out the window, when I just said very quietly that I felt extremely intimidated and also bullied by her and this whole treatment was unacceptable and removed myself out of that room! I cleared my desk- told the office manager why I was going and duly left- a few miles down the road I called the company to see if I had got the position! yes I did!! I thought I might end up stacking shelves !!! So my dear lady rottwieler has now got to train someone from scratch, and instead of going on her hols might just have to give some time up! All totally unnecessary behaviour! Am so glad i make the break- there is a way sometimes of saying that bullying is not acceptable in a quiet way and probably more effective that loosing it and looking unstable idiot- just what they want!!!! So that was my quiet ~Waterloo!
Claire
Clair,
You heroine you! Excellent result. Lucky too. So nice to get a break like that. But it could all have been so different if the business took its responsibilities to heart and protected its staff from bullying.
Well done for making a quiet stand and voting with your feet.
How’s the new job? Hope it is all you expected.
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