Entries from July 2006 ↓

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On TV last night, I watched a documentary about Appollo 11 and how the historic 1969 mission almost never got off the launch pad. The problems the mission encountered included the almost certain death of the astronauts if the Saturn IV exploded before it cleared the launch tower, being followed by a UFO, absobing z-rays, LEM master alarm repeated on lunar descent, running out of fuel and being stranded on the moon because of a broken switch.

At the time, the general public were not aware of these dangers faced by the astronauts. NASA managed to contain the facts about the issues the mission faced.

The perception that alll was going to plan was maintained throughout.

I have always assumed that the command module fastened to a safety rocket at the pinnacle of the 360ft high Saturn IV rocket was able to blast away from the main rocket in the event of a catastrophic failure like a massive explosion at take-off.

Apparently my percetion has been upheld and managed rather well by NASA over the years until last night when I learned that the escape tower attached to the CM (command module with the astronauts strapped inside) needed two seconds to ignite the rockets that would blast the crew to safety.

According to the documentary, the explosions of the rupturing Saturn IV fuel tanks (millions of litres of hydrogen fuel) would occur quicker than the problem could be detected by the software onboard or at Space Centre to kickstart the ejection process, thus nullifying the 2 second window required by the safety system. The 3 crew members would have died instantly.

I was shocked. There are some seriously good and well skilled Perception Artists out there. Now I cannot trust NASA anymore.

There are days that I just give up. I literally say quietly to myself ” I cannot cope”! It is true. I can’t cope with the amazing amount of sensational information in blogosphere.

It “smuggles” my mind. My brain goes on the fritz at the sheer scale of it all. The thirst for knowledge is becoming too much and I am getting overwhelmingly frustrated that my choices of blogs to read each day is too few of the right stuff.

I like a balanced diet of personal, marketing, technological, inspirational and humour. Some sites combine all of these and satiate my hunger temporarily. Others produce few blogs but when they are posted, they are of incredible quality and leave me wanting more.

I guess I need to accept that as long as I have this hunger to learn, I will avoid wrinkles! They say that a very healthy thirst/hunger for learning is a very good ageing deterrent. Let’s see!

I am also finding new blogs where the specialist subject easily lends itself to buzzword bingo, acronyms and rampant technobilge. Thankfully the authors are mature and intelligent enough to realise that technobilge is pure braggardsville nonsense and thus have ensured that their penmanship is in beautifully simple and totally understandable English. The use of Technobilge is extremely limited and this pleases me no end.

To all of you to whom I refer, I say “THANK YOU”! Many will know me by the inane comments I leave behind. Please do know that if I leave my calling card, it means you have imparted something of value to me and are helping me to enrich myself. For this and the fact that it is free knowledge you let me take, I really do thank you!

If you know nothing about Ooze, then stay tuned ‘cos here come the Dummies Guides to Ooze.

This is Rule 1 and this is the safety rule. It is optional of course but it is always best to share an ooze with another. Just in case.

Last evening I read Hugh Macleod’s blogs here related to the problem of label design and message the labels can deliver.

This led to another article here that led to this piece that took me to this nice advice.

I read and learned and have to ask, if you know the label could become a sticking point or a design problem due to regulatory requirement as per this message, “..and the label is one of the most regulated areas in the industry.” then instead, why not consider the shape of the bottle and change it so that it is unique and stands out?

Obviously, economics and again regulatory requirements apply but would this constitutre a way to ensure the product stands out from the crowded shelves?

Punters who have never heard of the estate need to learn that it exists and produces a good wine. If the bottle is not one of the normal run of the mill shapes, it surely stands a better chance of being looked at, picked up, perused, label read and thus get better opportunity of being purchase than just standing there gathering dust and wallowing on the shelf like a ‘wallflower’ at a ball waiting for a dude to come along and ask for a dance?

Here is another take on it in pictorial mode. Earlier while vacuuming the lounge, I drifted into that creative state we all go into at times and imagined The Invisible Oozer sneaking up on non-oozer people and Psssting them!

Ever since reading Hugh Macleod’s article at Gapingvoid his oozing principle has lodged itself centre of my mind lately. To the extent that at the office I find I am observing interactions abetween colleagues to see what happens while they engage and especially the body language and facial expressions resulting from their conversation when they disengage.

Very interesting observations indeed. Mostly I think it has been neutral to serious with very few lighthearted exchanges. Says something about the state of business.

UK’s Matthew Stibbe at Bad Language has reported on an article by Jack Shafer from Slate about the Pew Internet & American Life Project telephone survey by Amanda Lenhart and Susannah Fox to establish who we bloggers are and why we blog.

Some interesting though sceptical data due to too much use of the word “about” is revealed. According to the survey:

1. about half of American bloggers are male.

2. about half are under the age of 30yrs.

3. about half hide behind a pseudonym.

4. about half blog to relate personal experiences.

etc etc.

Go read the survey here

Anyone interested to sponsor a survey of UK bloggers?

How to run a plumbing business.

Flush TV

John Woods over at Make Marketing History shows us that if you cannot understand the instructons o your new mobile, DVD or any other appliance or are befuddled by the jargon, then there is help here at TMTI (Talk Me Through It)

I think the slogan is brilliant to be on wine bottle labels. You could not walk past the bottle without at minimum picking it up to see what the fuss is all about. And if you did not know about Hugh at Gapinvoid or Stormhoek, then by picking up the bottle you are about to be oozed and then schmoozed into making the purchase.

Tell me you could not be curious about seeing a wine bottle with a cartoon for a label. Go on, could you honestly walk on by and not pick it up to satify your curiosity?

So what is wrong with Hugh’s “Buy me or the puppy gets it” slogan? It’s great. It brings something new to wine buying. The threat of the possibility that Che’ or Hugh (supply your own dastardly villain), in mask and cape will swoop in and kidnap the Andrex puppy plus a bog roll is perplexingly provocative? Yes? Ludicrous too and the humour of this slogan should appeal to us all.

It brings a subtle hint of malevolence to the chance that a transaction will not occur but eventually when it does happen, the resultant purchase panders to Animal Right activists by ensuring the Andrex puppy remains alive and able to trawl more toilet tissue around a house and lines Stormhoeks pockets with lovely jingly dosh.

Of importance to all Africans. Click here to read The DATA Report 2006 here.

Ooze is Ooze and by any other name an Ooze is an Ooze is an Ooze. It is a word. It is a good word to use when you Ooze.

If you are not Oozing, then you can’t use the word Ooze. The definition of the term is here at Hugh’s gapingvoid. And to not ooze will impact the future. So you must Ooze now and always. Don’t stop Oozing because if you do stop, nothing will happen and if nothing happens, Ooze will not be oozed and that is bad.

Even Zappa oozed on Overnight Sensation when you hear him sing/state, ” I am the slime oozing out of your TV set. You will obey me…”

I think in this example there is definate correlation to today’s oozing. Must be. Zappa is telling you that the stuff oozing out of the TV set is indeed nothing else but marketing messages in a variety of formats be it government spin and propoganda or Colgate, Ford or Gerber wanting to engage you in conversation.

So if oozing was good enough for Zappa, it is good enough for me! There. That is it. I have decided. Hugh says that Ooze is the future of marketing and I like that. Ooze to you Hugh!

Go ooze people. Ooze away. I’m oozing now. See the oozing? Watch Robbie ooze! Cool ooze!

Hugh Macleod at Gapingvoid, has written a great post for you marketers about your future as Oozers

A cartoon is Ooze. Stormhoek paying for gapingvoid’s bandwidth is an Ooze. A blog post is an Ooze. As a marketing blogger, this to me is the part of post-Cluetrain marketing that is the most interesting.

Go read this great piece. Go on shoo. Get out of my face and go learn something. Shoo!

I need to go see my boss and establish if he is in the right frame of mind for Oozing me with goodiebags, a corner office with a view, an upgraded company car, a new laptop, bonuses and more corporate golf days and trips abroad!

Go away. Go, I’m gone!

If you did not know it already, the blogosphere has now got its A, B and C list bloggers. According to John Dvorak, for some people this portends the end of blogging as we knew it.

He then goes on to state that the end will be nigh when a blogging song is penned and goes to number 1 on hit parades. I agree.

Meanwhile, behind the scenes now, the scramble is really on. Competition just got dirtier and tougher. You can imagine the B and C listers mission is now to ascend to the dizzy heights of the A list.

Like footie wives who either follow or try to outdo each other (why do they buy the same style sunglasses and jeans and as for those belts…?), the ultimate is to be up there to do press and media and be seen or have a significantly high number of site vistors read your blinged out site that consists of blogging’s equivalent of latest designer fashionwear accessories.

The lists are a shame because it introduces an “ism” into what was once a free and equal realm.

You are now effectively a nobody unless you are listed. And the higher the grade bestowed on you by whomever creates the rules, the more you will be visited and linked to. So in effect the arseholes who created Blogebrity now practice blogger APARTHEID. Us and them.

Nice one! Not.